Zero Regret: Z and Lilly, Part Two (Lost Kings MC Book 13) Read online




  ZERO REGRET

  (LOST KINGS MC #13)

  AUTUMN JONES LAKE

  CONTENTS

  Acknowledgments

  Social Media

  Zero Hour

  The Lost Kings MC

  Free

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Chapter 34

  Chapter 35

  Chapter 36

  Chapter 37

  Chapter 38

  Chapter 39

  Chapter 40

  Chapter 41

  Chapter 42

  Chapter 43

  Chapter 44

  Chapter 45

  Chapter 46

  Chapter 47

  Chapter 48

  Chapter 49

  Coming This Summer…!

  Author Notes

  Also by Autumn Jones Lake

  Request from Autumn

  The End

  Zero Regret (Lost Kings MC #13)

  Copyright 2019 All Rights Reserved.

  Autumn Jones Lake

  Digital ISBN # 978-1-943950-36-2

  Paperback ISBN #:978-1-943950-37-9

  Edited by: Kerri Boehm

  Proofread by: Rosa Sharon

  Cover Models: Justin Cox and Megan Napolitan

  Photographer: Wander Aguiar

  Cover Designed by: RBA Designs

  No part of Zero Regret (Lost Kings MC #13), may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photography, recording, or any information storage and retrieval system without the prior written consent of the publisher and author, except in the instance of quotes for reviews. No part of this book may be shared or uploaded without the permission of the publisher and author, nor be otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is originally published. No part of this book may be translated into any other language without permission of the author.

  The Lost Kings MC™ series are works of fiction. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, or places, actual events or locales is purely coincidental. The characters and names are products of the author’s imagination and used fictitiously.

  The publisher and author acknowledge the trademark status and trademark ownership of all trademarks, service marks and word marks mentioned in this book.

  Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights.

  This is an original work of fiction by Autumn Jones Lake. The Lost Kings MC Series is a trademark of Ahead of the Pack LLC.

  [email protected]

  ABOUT ZERO REGRET

  Love happens when you least expect it. So does heartbreak.

  I thought we were finally done with the lies.

  Secrets? Sure, Lilly’s still holding on to plenty of those.

  My perfect woman is secrets buried under beautiful layers of deception.

  She’s the seductive siren bent on destroying my heart.

  It doesn’t make me want her any less.

  Just like before, she’s an addiction I can’t break.

  I’ll never learn my lesson when it comes to her.

  But I refuse to ever let her go.

  One by one I’ll unlock all her secrets.

  I love a challenge. And I’ve never followed the rules.

  Now that she’s back in my life, she’s mine forever.

  And anyone who hurts or threatens her better prepare to die.

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  The ladies in my “Lounge” on Facebook. Thank you so much for showing up with your love and kindness every day! Not only for me and for the Lost Kings but for each other as well!

  Rosa, Jezzie, Liz, Dani, thank you for helping find those last minute things!

  Thank you to Justin Cox for your enthusiasm and helping me promote Z’s books!

  Big thank you to Mr. Lake who continues to encourage all of my most evil ideas!

  SOCIAL MEDIA

  Sign up for Autumn’s Newsletter

  BookBub

  Book + Main Bites

  Goodreads

  Instagram

  Facebook

  Twitter

  Autumn’s Lost Kings MC Lounge

  Pinterest

  Spotify

  www.autumnjoneslake.com

  DON’T FORGET to check out ZERO HOUR: A Prequel to Zero Tolerance. It’s currently free everywhere!

  Download Zero Hour here.

  Zero Tolerance should be read before Zero Regret. Purchase here.

  THE LOST KINGS MC

  ULTIMATE SERIES READING ORDER

  Complete descriptions and links are at the end of the book.

  Slow Burn (Lost Kings MC #1)

  Corrupting Cinderella (Lost Kings MC #2)

  Three Kings, One Night (Lost Kings MC #2.5)

  Strength from Loyalty (Lost Kings MC #3)

  Tattered on my Sleeve (Lost Kings MC #4)

  White Heat (Lost Kings MC #5)

  Between Embers (Lost Kings MC #5.5)

  Bullets & Bonfires (standalone in the LOKI world)

  More Than Miles (Lost Kings MC #6)

  Unhinged (Iron Bulls MC #5) by Phoenyx Slaughter

  Warnings & Wildfires (standalone in the LOKI world)

  White Knuckles (Lost Kings MC #7)

  Beyond Reckless (Lost Kings MC #8)

  Beyond Reason (Lost Kings MC #9)

  One Empire Night (Lost Kings MC #9.5)

  After Burn (Lost Kings MC #10)

  After Glow (Lost Kings MC #11)

  Zero Hour (Lost Kings MC #11.5)

  Zero Tolerance (Lost Kings MC #12)

  Zero Regret (Lost Kings MC #13)

  Zero Apologies (Lost Kings MC #14)

  Cards of Love: Knight of Swords (standalone in the LOKI world)

  COMING SOON:

  White Lies (Lost Kings MC #15)

  Matches & Misfires

  Lost Kings MC #16

  Lost Kings MC #17

  FREE

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  DEDICATION

  The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.

  Martin Luther King, Jr.

  CHAPTER ONE

  ZERO

  I THOUGHT we were done with the lies.

  How much deception am I supposed to take from the woman I love until I lose it and give up?

  Lilly lied to me.

  Again.

  Ted’s words won’t stop echoing in
my head. I’m her fiancé.

  That can’t be right. I asked her to marry me a couple hours ago.

  She said yes.

  But she’d already said yes to this guy.

  This guy? Really?

  He’s still standing on the porch, awkwardly shifting from foot to foot.

  He ain’t gettin’ an invitation inside from me.

  “Dammit, Ted,” Lilly snaps. “That’s not true. We’re not engaged.”

  “Seems like an odd thing to be confused about.” My voice comes out laced with acid. I want nothing more than to jump on my bike and spray gravel all over Ted’s shiny rental car. Fifteen, twenty years ago, I probably would’ve done exactly that the second this clown showed up and opened his mouth.

  Today, I have a son. I need to be here for him. No matter what.

  “Z, it’s not true.” Her fingers lightly brush against my bare chest, chasing the chill away.

  I drag my gaze from Ted to Lilly. An hour ago, she was wrapped around me, whispering declarations of love in my ear while clawing at my back.

  Was she doing the same out in California with this guy?

  Her hand’s still pressed to my chest and as I glance down, the loose sleeve of the robe she threw on when Ted came knocking slips down. The fine edge of the scar I asked about earlier peeks out and somehow, I just know it’s connected to Ted. To everything.

  It’s painful. Personal. And she was about to let me in. Finally.

  Before Ted interrupted.

  I grip the doorknob tighter. “You got an engagement ring?” I ask Lilly.

  Too stunned by my change in attitude, Lilly shakes her head. “What?”

  Ted’s such a swell guy, he pipes up and answers for Lilly. “It’s back in California.”

  That’s all I need to know.

  “You can talk to her tomorrow, Ted,” I say. “Thanks for stopping by.” With that dismissal, I shove the door closed, slamming it in Ted’s face with a satisfying bang.

  Outside, he mumbles something, but a minute later, a car starts up and speeds down the driveway.

  I turn and face Lilly, who’s already backing away from me. “Start talking.”

  “Ted’s just a friend.”

  “I don’t give a fuck about Ted.”

  Like a snake, I strike, grabbing both of her wrists in one hand and turning them over. Ruthlessly, I shove both her sleeves out of my way. “What happened?”

  She jerks back, but I hold on tighter.

  “An accident.”

  “Bullshit. What accident leaves identical scars like this? Try again.”

  “Z,” she pleads.

  “And I know damn well you didn’t have them before, so don’t even try.”

  “I can’t.” She’s pleading with everything in her to let this go. Her big brown eyes brimming with tears, her beautiful face, her body that she’s desperately trying to pull out of my grip. “Z, I can’t.”

  “You can and you will. I think I’ve been more than patient. I asked you to marry me before. You said yes. Then a few hours later, some clown I’ve never even heard of shows up claiming he’s your fiancé? I’m out of patience with you, woman.”

  “You’re hurting me.”

  The high, thin whine to her voice jars me enough to release her. She retreats but I’m not done with her. No way.

  Step for step, I track her into the living room.

  Lilly’s a strong woman. Almost nothing seems to make her flinch. Guilt lashes at me for the way she’s unraveling because of my questions.

  “Who hurt you?” I ask.

  She jerks her head up. “What?”

  Gentler this time, I reach out and trace my finger over the soft inside of her arm. “Who did this?”

  Tears I didn’t want to cause roll down her cheeks. She opens her mouth and slicks her tongue over her lips a few times before finally giving me the answer I never expected.

  “I did.”

  CHAPTER TWO

  Lilly

  A CLOUD of pain wraps around my throat, threatening to suffocate me.

  What a nightmare.

  I almost wish Z hadn’t chased Ted away, because I’d like to strangle him.

  My own fault. Weeks ago, I should’ve yanked up my big girl panties and told Ted our marriage–of his convenience–couldn’t happen.

  That I could have handled with a simple phone call.

  Z standing in front of me demanding answers, I can’t deal with that. I should have told him about Ted, even if I can’t tell him the whole story. But my lies have become a part of me to protect myself. It’s my story. The story of two Lillys. The one before. And the one after. Both of them are full of pain and regret. Regrets I can’t erase. Pain I don’t want to share with anyone. Especially Z.

  There’s a reason I keep my arms covered as much as possible.

  I don’t care what anyone else thinks.

  It’s me. I can’t stand the reminder of my own weakness. And the events that led me to the darkest time of my life. To attempt something I never thought I was capable of.

  “Tell me why,” Z persists in a much gentler tone than he used a few seconds ago. “What happened?”

  Unable to force out the words, I shake my head and more tears burn my eyelids.

  “Here,” he says, pushing a glass of water into my hands.

  He’s quiet while I take a long sip, but then he sits on the couch next to me and pulls my hands into his lap. “Talk to me. You used to say you never wanted kids. Did…you…did this happen when you found out you were pregnant?”

  His struggle to understand is clear in his voice so the question doesn’t offend me. Besides, he’s right. I didn’t know how much I wanted to be a mother until Ted pressed that tiny sonogram picture in my hand.

  “No.” My voice comes out more than a harsh whisper. “I found out I was pregnant because of this.” I trace my finger down the line on my left arm. It’s straighter than the one on my right. It’s deeper too. I’m right-handed. “Chance saved me,” I whisper.

  Maybe that sounds ridiculous. But it’s true in so many ways.

  “Well, technically Ted saved me,” I add.

  “How?”

  “He was the doctor on-call at the hospital.”

  What words can explain it to a man like Z? Everything about him radiates strength and bravery. Qualities that appeal to me more than ever. With Z, I always feel safe and protected.

  He seems invincible and I’ve never wanted to drag him into anything that could bring him harm.

  “Lilly, talk to me. Why does he think you’re engaged?”

  Ah, that one weakness of Z’s—his caveman mentality—might actually allow me to escape this conversation with a shred of dignity. He wants to know about my relationship with Ted. Not the intimate, painful details that led to us meeting in the first place. That I can handle.

  “It’ll sound silly to you.”

  “It was important enough for him to fly across the country.”

  “Well, we’re friends, too.” Although, after he showed up without warning and told Z we were engaged, I may have to rethink our friends status.

  “Do you live with him?”

  “No,” I answer with more force than intended. “He did ask me to move in with him before I came home.”

  His jaw tightens. “You and my son?”

  “Yes.”

  “And what did you say?”

  I swallow hard. Z’s not going to like this answer. “That I’d think about it.”

  “So, I didn’t even know my kid existed, but you were going to think about moving in with another man?”

  “It’s not like that.”

  “Then tell me what it’s like,” he insists. By the tightness of his jaw, I can tell his patience is about to snap. “I never asked,” he says. “But you sort of implied you hadn’t been dating anyone.”

  “We weren’t dating. We’re friends.” My gaze skips to the front door. “Although, I’m not so sure about that anymore.”

  Z doe
sn’t see the humor in my gripe. “Friends don’t usually ask friends to marry them.”

  Do I share Ted’s secret? After the bomb he tried to drop on my life, I should. It still feels wrong, but it feels worse to keep any more secrets from Z. “Ted has a…complicated relationship with his family.”

  “What’s that got to do with anything?”

  I should’ve known an answer that vague wouldn’t satisfy Z.

  My teeth sink into my bottom lip until it stings. I swipe my tongue over the spot and catch Z’s eyes following the movement. I don’t even have it in me to try and distract him with sex. Not when he’s been so patient and deserves some answers.

  “Lilly?” he prompts.

  “His family’s politically connected and he has certain obligations he’s supposed to fulfill.”

  “Don’t tell me.” Z lets out a dark chuckle. “He’s gay and needs a wife for cover.”

  When I don’t laugh, he cuts a look my way. “You’re kidding. Who still does that?”

  “You’d be surprised.”

  He snorts. “I thought California was so progressive.”

  “Maybe. But his family isn’t. There’s an inheritance and he needs to be married…to a woman to collect it. When enough time had passed, we would’ve gotten divorced.”

  “Why would you even consider something like that?”

  I sigh and almost regret admitting this. “I know what it’s like to be scorned by your family for things that are out of your control. He helped me when I needed it and I wanted to do the same.”

  By the way Z’s jaw keeps flexing, he’s having a hard time objecting to my reasoning.

  “That’s it?”

  “Well, I have a lot of…medical debt. From…before…and from when I had Chance and he was going to help me with that.”

  “Lilly, that’s my responsibility. Not some guy who’s too spineless to tell his family to fuck off.”

  Once again, in his own crude way, Z proves he’s so damn honorable I have no business being with him.

  “Mommy?” Chance calls.

  I breathe a sigh of relief.

  “We’re not done,” Z says in a low voice, right before Chance shuffles into the living room.

  Our son stands there, rubbing his eyes and pouting. “It was loud. And someone yelled.” He looks around the room, his gaze finally landing on Z. He scowls as if he blames Z for every new nocturnal noise in his life.